[…]

With apologies to dicks and heads everywhere.

Union electioneering is in full swing at Sheffield Uni, and as ever, there is one “funny” candidate. Said “funny” candidate has today placed a board in a prominent position on the Union concourse which reads “[funny candidate’s name]: never successfully charged with molestation”.

Molestation! Ha! The widespread failure to bring abusers and rapists to justice! Guffaw!

I told Mr Funny that a large proportion of the women walking across the concourse will have been molested or similar. That most of them wouldn’t have seen the perpetrator brought to justice. And that when I saw his sign I was reminded of the time I was (to use his term) molested and now feel pretty damn upset.

Now, Mr Funny understands this, but you see his dilemma is that loads of people – men and women – have been coming up to him and telling him just how funny his sign is.

What to do, what to do…

He assures me that he’s going to write a new sign. I even went and got him paint and a brush. But he’s just too busy right now.

Meanwhile, I’m back on that platform in Barcelona.

EDIT: He later added “of birds of prey” to the bottom of the sign. Hopefully the message got through for next time.