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In All the Things You See

[Edited to add: Trigger warning: this post involves abusive behaviour towards a child and possible body dysphoria issues]

On the Botox injections and pubic waxing, that is.

Here is a story about a little girl who has been regularly subjected to such procedures since those tell-tale signs of ageing set in on her eighth birthday. (I know it’s a bit rude of me to give a lady’s age away, and so publicly too, but we feminist types are notoriously without an appropriate sense of shame when it comes to these things.)

This little girl is also really looking forward to her breast implants. One can only assume that whatever size it is her breasts will eventually reach without surgical assistance will by definition be too small – because they don’t contain implants, of course.

When will I hear about the first breast implants for babies? Surely pharmaceutical companies need to get cracking on marketing pre-natal beauty products, so that anxious parents can rush out to empty their wallets once they think they’re caring for a female foetus? There’s an important market to cater to here!

I’ve heard some strange arguments, in my time, that “anti-ageing” beauty treatments capitalise on the anxieties women feel about become older – and therefore marginalised and invisible in societies that devalue them and promote an ever more unrealistic vision of idealised youth. It’s also been said that pubic shaving simulates for adult women a return to pre-pubescent youth – and that the popularity of the practice is related to the widespread tendency to infantilise women. How wrong all these people have it! It’s not that women are being judged according to impossible and dehumanising values, since even actual pre-pubescent girls are deficient and need to be fixed, the sooner the better. I mean, what business do they have, developing “fluffy leg hair” as children, and failing to remain “baby-faced” past the age of being, well, babies?

No, no, the problem doesn’t lie in the artificial, stifling and exploitative requirements of beauty. The problem is, quite obviously, women and girls. Women and girls are all wrong, always wrong: and beauty is the answer.

Every three months Kerry Campbell sits her daughter Britney on a beautician’s table and injects botox and fillers into Britney’s face, The Sun reports.

The 34-year-old mum from Birmingham, UK buys the substances online and from a local “beauty supplier”.

She also takes Britney to have her body waxed in a pre-emptive bid to stop her growing hair when she does hit puberty.

“What I am doing for Britney now will help her become a star,” she says.

“I know one day she will be a model, actress or singer, and having these treatments now will ensure she stays looking younger and baby-faced for longer. […]

“She also has her virgin wax monthly, which gets rid of her fluffy leg hair and makes sure she wont develop pubic hair in the future,” said Ms Campbell.

“It will save her a fortune in waxing when she’s older.”

Britney also wants breast enhancements and a nose job soon “so that I can be a star,” the child said.

“My friends think it’s cool I have all the treatments and they want to be like me. I check every night for wrinkles, when I see some I want more injections.”

Image by Thomas Hawk, used under a Creative Commons license